It’s been a while since I’ve posted on YT. I know I’m sorry, and although this vlog is long overdue I still wanted to post it. I hope that you guys enjoy it and there should be a few more to come! Lemme know what you want for the next video!
Acoustic Female Singer-Songwriter…
I can’t wait for the summer. I’m already dreaming about doing nothing with my time. Just reading, playing guitar, traveling, swimming, hanging out with friends and family. School is already beyond me.
Where Should I Start…
Robert-Jacob Hinojosa- movie buff, sports fanatic, music lover, comedian…
On January 23, 2018, at my living room apartment, I interview RJ as he does his accounting homework while watching the Kansasa vs Oklahoma basketball game. I’m procrastinating my reading homework. But don’t worry, we got our stuff done anyway.
For everyone, I think 2017 was honestly crappy. It was. But I also believe that it’s given me a whole new change and perspective on life, and myself. I’ve had so many new experiences and met so many new people. I’ve come to realizations about myself and others. I’ve reconnected with people and I lost others.
I know that this year generally was “hard” and the “worst” for everyone, but I think it was the most changing for myself. Lately, I have not been so great when it comes to posting my poetry and other things, I know that the Christmas break is one part of the procrastination. However, I’ve been experiencing some emotional things in my life. Mentally I feel as if I get depressed, sad, and the loss of motivation. Sometimes I’ll be mentally drained that it’s too hard or too much to do anything. It’s something I struggle with a lot and I usually don’t talk about. I get self-conscious and I worry about making something great and good to place in a public space. I don’t want to label it or make it seem like I’m the only one with this problem. I know other people go through that. Even now I’m not fully explaining how I feel and other anxiety issues I have. But that’s for another time. I think these emotions and stressfulness has a lot to do with the way the world is now. College scars us 18 to 25 year olds, and exerts so much stress on us. And the answer to that is just to “deal with it” or “That’s how life is”. No, it doesn’t have to be like that.
Maybe 2018 can give us a new start to make something wonderful in life. To make life not shitty for ourselves. That is one thing I want to do for myself. 2017 has taken so much from me and given so much back. And I want to reflect on the great things that have happened in 2017.
First off 2017 gave me the chance to travel outside the states. I had the wonderful opportunity to go visit my Dad and my step Mom in Okinawa, Japan. I still can’t believe I got to experience a culture like Japan’s. To this day I still miss it and I can’t wait to go back this summer. I know for sure we’re going to go to Thailand or another country for 2 weeks. I recommend that everyone should go experience a new culture and travel someday in their lives. Everyone needs to leave the US for a vacation at some point. I got to taste the difference of the air, feel the sun’s warmth with a different welcome.
I know I met my boyfriend in 2016, but in 2017 he has always been there with me. I cant think of a time when we were apart. He’s made me realize some things about myself and has brought out the greatness in me. I know this may be sappy but it’s true that someone you care about really does bring out the best in you. He’s my punching bag, he’s my teddy bear, he’s the ear that I talk to, he’s the person that makes me laugh so hard I start crying and I forget all the bad things that happened. I hope I’ve done the same for him as much as he’s done for me. This brings me to my wonderful roommates that I lived with in 2017 and the many people I met through them. They brought me out of my introverted shell and given me a whole new relationship with myself and others.
Three highlights of the year would have to be the fact that I got to see The Garden, Mac Demarco, and The Shins all in this year. YES, I DID! I have to say that I’m proud of myself for buying those tickets. It is so fucking amazing that they all decided to stop by Austin to do a show. It was like the Gods of Music smiled down at me and said, “Hollie you deserve this”. This goes to show that 2017 did have something to put up.
In the second half of 2017 gave me the chance to do what I want in a college. I gave back myself the chance to write, which is one of my greatest passions. It’s the main tool I use to cope with things in my life. One of my greatest fears is losing my memory which is why I write in a journal. I have so many thoughts and words to say and I found that writing was the way to channel all the sounds in my head. This blossomed my nick for writing poetry.
From what I can remember this has been my 2017 in a wrap-up. I’m sure a lot of other stuff has happened but I’m going to move on from that. Starting off…I want to be better at writing poetry and with music. I did a song recently, fully done and cleaned. I’ll decide when to post it on here. But yes, that is one new thing that has led up to this new year. I will make more songs soon! Sorry if this post seemed like a ramble.
I hope you all have entered 2018 with some grace, kisses, love, and happiness. And I wish for it to continue on.
So currently I am on Christmas Break, which is pretty great considering I have almost a whole month of no school. I have time to do things, to read, write, make music, and do mostly nothing.
Now this month has been interesting- emotionally. I feel like that’s usually the case when it involves the beginning of the month, or towards the ending of the month. I know I have not been doing so great with my writing/blogging portion, but I have drafts that are waiting to be published, I’ve literally been taking a break and contemplating about a lot of things, which I should write down. I’ve also been thinking about changing the style of my blog, but that’s on the thinking block.
So Christmas was really nice! I did get great gifts and caught up with my family and friends. I always believed it was so weird having so many people in your home, with so much noise and questions. It still is weird. But besides that, we have the new year to look forward too. Yes, 2018. It is fascinating to think that the year has already come to an end. I can’t even remember some of the things that have happened, so many things that have been lost, gained, learned, failed, succeeded. 2017 has been a really long year for some of us. But one interesting thing for us Texans is that it snowed. 🙂
My family’s lives have changed, people are growing, they moved to a new house. I have a different room now, all empty and unlived in. I think I’ve gotten used to it all, even if the house is 30 minutes away from my hometown. That’s what makes it hard, to be far from my friends and boyfriend, and the closeness of them all.
I feel like this time would be perfect for me to keep working on my writing and music. My only problem is procrastination and no motivation. But I hope I can whip myself back to where I want to be. I’ve been listening to a lot of music and watching a lot of movies, so maybe there might be a spark of inspiration there.
I hope to hear from ya’ll in the next year! (don’t worry I’m not leaving)
Day 12: Write a poem in the perspective of a stranger
I see her staring at me.
She looks like she ought to be a person that always stares, I know how she feels.
I’m staring back.
I’ll go back to my ways. But, I wonder. What are the chances of seeing that person again?
I wonder how many people looked at me and thought the same thing. I doubt it.
But it’s a thought.
What are the odds that I will see that woman again, the staring woman?
I won’t give it another thought, let me go on my day.
But, did she think the same thing too-
there she goes walking away.
Hm, will she see me again?
This month has been pretty eventful. There were so many birthdays including mine! There were concerts and friends trips and dinners. I got to see my family and listen to new music and movies. Of course, there was college filling in the gaps keeping me busy.
I think this was a pretty good month. This past Thanksgiving vacation was much needed. I am so thankful to have been able to spend time with my family. I think that giving yourself a rest from school and work is such an important thing for the mind and body. Its necessary for me, I get so stressed and overworked that I forget to give time for myself. Which is why I listen to a lot of music and new artists. It keeps my mind calm and functional. But that’s just me, music will always be a part of my life.
Day #5: Write a Eulogy
It is coincidence that today is the day,
The day that it happened.
I talked about you yesterday when filing through passed names
Yours that my brother holds
but he never knew you.
Your skin was light and eyes blue, or green
I was too small to remember.
It is so hard to believe that you would end
That people even give ends to themselves.
I only remember your smiles and laughter
And the first time you took me on an errand to the mermaids coffee
And I wasn’t even tall enough to see past the car window.
You were a father
You were a husband
You were a brother
You were an uncle
You were a friend of all
Hello! This is the first day starting my 30 Days of Poetry Challenge. In advance- may mess up with some consistency in these first 3 days. I have a lot on my plate and I forgot to plan my days correctly. But I hope you enjoy this! Maybe I’ll even make a playlist of songs I listened to when I made these poems. This is going to be interesting…lets see how it goes! 🙂
Day #1: Write a poem about hellos.
A welcoming smile is brighter than the sun
But the sun brings me a blanket over the night
And when the night greets my eyes
I am hugged to sleep
Headless and Heavy, everyone might be sleeping in
But I make the time to say hello to my consciousness.
People awkwardly make eye contact because it is the normal thing to do
When you see someone in the hallway they find you too
And the sincere wave and smile
Never goes further than that, unless there is more
What was their name again?
After the crowd of introductions and papers
Speakers whom you forget their name….
I embrace your still stature, and together we walk to our respective.
This the welcome that never gets old.
I know your name and I know their names
How great is it to see you again
Headless and heavy, I see the overcast of sleep
And It asks me to be their friend while I can barely hold myself up
My eyes crisscross feet and focus on focusing
Good times roll, and punching media and essays of what comes next
Hands on the side and jeans off
I take it slowly and lay still.
For you, you seem alone, and I’ve known many like you
I’ve lived with many like you.
And I feel like you
Till I am not like you
And asked a question of how to see you.
The woven lungs and snowflakes hide the strain
And as you drain
The stains of mental drain is a blood bath
It cleans and gleams on the reflection of my iris
The expectations of the tenderness of skin and meat are so unlikely
It doesn’t tear but rather
They can’t bite the fact that this is what I am
The inedible definitions does not nurture their minds
Its dry and sticky and far from replenish
Swallow my teeth to see if it grows in thier head
And seasons bring the ripest one of all
Till again I am covered in my own blood.
ON OCTOBER 1 I attended a concert for one of my most favorite artists ever
What I forgot was that The Garden is touring with Mac Demarco’s group. I bought these tickets to ACL Live about maybe six months ago and what I only new what that The Flamming Lips was performing with a opening performance of Mac Demarco (which is who I really wanted to see, but I do like The Flamming Lips). Anyway, I had no idea that The Garden was going to perform. The week before the concert I kept getting emails reminding me to print my tickets before the concert. At the end of the email it had the line up which was:
The Garden 8:00
Mac Demarco 8:50
Flamming Lips 10:40
And I completely flipped out. My boyfriend told me not to get my hopes up. But why would they even put that in the email? Was my ticket finally fully worth what I was paying for. And what do you know…….The Garden came out and did an amazing set. Nothing could describe how happy I was to see them. Me and RJ where up in the balcony assigned seating in the first row so the view was perfect. The only problem was that no one in the balcony wanted to stand and jam out. Technically the population of the crowd was 80% in their forties with no idea who Mac Demarco or The Garden was. Me and RJ were itching so bad to stand up but we didn’t because we would block people behind us. Next time though, we will see Mac in the pit. Damn, I can’t even describe the feeling when I saw him, it was so surreal.