An old poem about secrets and nights.
Everything is uniform…
So I’m still struggling with one thing. ONE THING, and it’s my own fault…clothes.
I miss my closet so much! Going on a month with just whatever I brought in my duffle bag is not working out for me. I have run out of ideas on what to wear, and I am going through withdrawals from the lack of shopping. I’m not a shopaholic per see, but I do like to clean out my closet, sell my clothes, and buy new ones with my credit. Okay, that is being a shopaholic, but I still minimize and not lose money at the same time! It’s good for my pocket and for the environment. But…I bought clothes online.
In a way, I had too. Reuse and thrift stores are beaten right now and the only service I had to get through this quarantine is online shopping. I guess some of that lands in my favor and companies. But still, I wish I can support the other. I would buy from Depop but I have no idea when I will be back in my apartment to collect the packages.
But as a fun and wonderful surprise for myself self I bought the clothes with a 50 dollar credit I had :). Not only that, but I also bought makeup from Glossier that I was running out of!
“I’m going to let you in on a little secret: Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don’t plan it, don’t wait for it, just let it happen” – Dale Cooper, Twin Peaks
I like to live by this motto, I mean of course, I did plan to have a package shipped to me, but it was the impulse to buy.
To break this uniform I decided to shave my armpits 😦 and I regret it. I was bored! What can I do?! And I noticed that people were getting hair cuts and I wanted to cut something of mine.
I also got a hair cut. HAHAHAHA! You want to know the truth? It’s not bad at all. I actually did collaborative hair cutting with my friends Sophie and Alma. Us girls need to release our stress some way. Ours is spontaneous hair cuts :).
One of my uniforms of the week, also a new hair cut…looks the same..haha
I think today needs to be a creative day. Honestly, with this time on my hands, it has been hard to even make. I don’t even listen to music sometimes :/. There is a lack of urgency and it’s killing me. Hmm, that sounds like a poem waiting to happen. There is a lack of urgency but I’m not alone. I feel like I have someone there to experience it with me, and then it’s not too bad, the urgency is there.
Something is missing but that makes room for the little things in life.
So be careful in there. Don’t cut your hair (do), jump around and make a dance to a song, have family karaoke, or a drinking night with friends where you put sharpie tattoos on each other’s necks 🙂
Taking it all in…
I guess this is day two. Right? What should this bring?
I realized that I didn’t pack enough clothes for home. I forgot my MPK to make music. I already lost two socks??? I finished High Fidelity….and I got furloughed…
Well, this was going to happen right? How would I get through my day, what will happen? When will I change out of my pj’s? Everything is going to be okay.
Today was a good day and I think it’s a matter of getting things done!
I got to wake up late, made some coffee and had some leftover Chinese food. I lounged a bit and had an addictive stroll with Animal Crossing! I occasionally checked a group chat I’m in to keep me updated with work, friends, and things in Austin. I had someone over so we painting with my brother our favorite movie scenes, played goldfish, SORRY!, Operation, an electric scooter (gotta get that sunlight), and of course the switch. Watched funny videos and hung out with my family while music played in the background.
Right now I’m in my very own downtime, which is always the end of the day. I think there’s a poem that I want to write, maybe I should draw and design some things. I feel that I’m just winging it for the most part when it comes to keeping up with the boredom. I just realized that I haven’t been able to do my usual walks around Austin- this is not the time to get sad. On another note, I’m considering buying a music/maker app on my switch…and I bought it. I feel like something is missing and I think it’s my space. My OWN sanctuary. Being under curfew and quarantine in a place hasn’t been my real home in 3, heck maybe 4 years is a lot to take in. But I can work around it.
Towards the end of the day I just hung out had some spaghetti and now here I am. I still feel in a creative mood along with reflective. Taking it all in is the step to this self-isolation, this art of isolation.
I have a few questions.
What color do you feel today? How do you take it all in?
I haven’t said much about what is going on in the world, but it has definitely been on my mind. A LOT. I worry…I have fears and anxieties. And with the whole COVID-19 and paranoia of the world population, I’ve been reconsidering human reactions and morals and just the way we treat each other during a world panic, and it’s upsetting. There will be massive consequences casualties to this pandemic and we will see it in the employment rate, the economy, education, politics, and on families. The best that we can do, that I can do is be a good person. Treat each other with love and with words and good intentions. To help those in need and to seek those that can’t ask for help themselves. I just want everyone to be okay you know, especially for the ones that I care about, and I’m sure you wish that too.
Two months have gone by and we are now in March! February seemed like the longest month ever, I thought it would never end. Not that I hate that month, it was just a buffer until March and April where spring, music, vacation, and concerts start dropping my way.
I think I’ve been lost in my own thoughts. Continue reading “-don’t be afraid of the room-“
Can creativity be at a high and low at the same time? The lack and slack of my blog posts have been bugging me but sometimes I am not the best at coordinating and organizing a plan. I usually work with my own time and patience unless it involves other people in the process.
I’ve been reaching to create and I’ve found that through drawing, sketching, doodling, and even writing random lines and lyrics. I think that I have a lot to express but not a big enough canvas to place every medium and content I want. I end up getting overwhelmed or too excited-in the end, nothing comes out of it! But sometimes I like to draw Continue reading “Fruits And Sharpie”
Hey everyone! I’ve been going back to the archives and listening to some new stuff. I went back to my roots and listened to some old bands I loved when I was a kid, and still do to this day. So please enjoy these picks and share!
I want to take a look back and remind myself that there are some good things, the best things, and favorite things in my life. I thought of this when I was going for a walk today around my campus and it reminded me of some beautiful things hidden. I’ve realized that I really like hidden corners haha. But, I felt like I should share some things that I appreciate.
Another assignment for the books…
THEY TELL ME NICE THINGS
There’s a club if you’d like
To jump off
I throw my head off
And I think
they like me
Inside there was the
Smile of tobacco
And a boy
But really, he’s just a boy with fingers
And a girl
Crying in my glass
Still tastes pretty
I pulled off my lips
And I found myself attractive
And the tobacco was still
Smiling in the corner
And I danced around jokes
My friends walked through
Puddles of fire
While I dig up some lode
Resigning my eardrums for the night
And we breezed
And told me nice things
For the second time I asked
why the clouds were late
I grew rosemary on my
temples and collected
tines in the morning
wax of secrets and diaries of
the second time, a second time
the world was made with
paper and construction blue
I love it when
my stomach jokes
and when my elbow drove me to the lake
with a door, and I
remembered the last time my liver was
handed, crowned with
jewels and baskets of
oranges, the ones picked
last night rolled back twice
on some moss’s jealousy
I wonder why
Why the second time
the clouds didn’t call today
Here is my lame attempt of making a mood/inspiration board, I mean who really makes them anyway right? Am I running out of ideas? No i’m not :). Anyway I just thought it would be fun to do this.
Well this is what goes on in my head for most of the time and it’s not even all of it. 🙂
Hi everyone, I’ve collected some poems but I strayed away from posting them. The class I’m taking has forced me ( in a good way) to write poems/lines/phrases again. I’m happy that I’m writing again, and I’ve noticed that my word choices and the poems themselves have changed. I’ll try to post the ones I do for class, but here is one that I wrote outside of it. I might use this is workshop, but I don’t know. I try not to devalue my poetry and I treat it as separate from myself. I hope you enjoy this short one.
I wrote this a few days ago, I’m already on my second day of classes 🙂
So the summer is coming to an end. I start classes this Wednesday and I feel weird about it. I feel almost indifferent. Not that I hate it, I just feel like it’s something I have to do, like breathing or making sure to eat. Continue reading “happiness is a- an update”
Hey everyone, the summer is coming to a close so it’s time to transition to the fall season! Here are some songs I’ve been listening to for the last part of the summer. The title was inspired by a quote from the movie “The Crow”- some songs in here are from Continue reading “-it cant rain all the time- a playlist”
While I was going through instagram an ad for a shaving company popped up on my feed. It was very different than any other shaving ad I’ve seen. First of all, the women in the ad had hair on their body. Continue reading “P1: Lengths To Body Love”
HAHAH don’t know what I was going for here but here is a new song for ya’ll to listen to! Now on Soundcloud and soon Bandcamp!
I was really inspired by a Beach House song… Continue reading “SOON OR L8TER – a new song”
It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these. I think the last one I did was around February. Now that it’s summer I can finally tell you a few things to come. I know I haven’t been posting lately and I think the last post I did was about two weeks ago, so it’s been a while! I’m sorry about that, things got really busy on the last few weeks of school and it seemed like I had no time for any personal projects or ideas I had. Plus, work takes up some of my free time so I had no motivation to set aside blog time. I feel like it’s been a month since I’ve done anything on here, but that should change soon! I’ve been going through a lot of things and I will be honest and say Continue reading “i only said – an update”
Hi, it’s been about a month? Maybe? And this “night” is not any particular night, its a lyric from a song that describes a lot of the first month and few weeks of the new year, and I thought I could reflect a little bit on it. Not in specifics but you know what I mean! Continue reading “New Harmony – An Update”
Let’s do two birds with one stone!
I just want to keep this post nice and short. I know this might be a little late but I wanted to make this post.
Although my birthday was filled with school and exams – it was also filled with people that I love and that care about me.
Don’t even waste your time feeling down or stressing about something in the past or to come. The future is ahead and there are moments to be enjoyed. 💖
I had such a great and beautiful 21st Birthday!
I love everyone and I hope you all have a wonderful night!